My name is S.J. Santiago and I am a writer, an artist, a musician and so much more…
I, like many people in my age group, have been through a lot, seen a lot and done a lot so I will save you the details and if we ever meet in person we can swap stories, of which there are many.
What I want to do here is give you a little insight as to how I am wired… we are all of course wired to a different tune and some of us only play 1 type of music but others, like myself, play every kind… if you do not understand what I am saying after you read through I hope it will become clear.
I am always trying to expand my mind by learning something new. I am always reading both fiction and non fiction books besides the assigned reading for school and I am also always trying to learn how to “do” something new. I taught myself to play the guitar last year, bought a kayak and learned how to do that. This year I bought a paddle board and will take it out and learn how to do that and I am going to buy a Cello and a Harp someday and tackle that…I am always looking for new things to learn and do because life is so very short and I want to experience as much of it as possible!
My heart: is huge. I have SO much love to give. I am passionate about everything that I do. I want to share this love and passion with everyone. I want to help anyone in any way I can and I want to give my love to those that will have it…my loyalty and support in friendships, my hugs and love in family, to passersby in a smile and someday to my life partner intimately and in every way possible.
My soul: Has some cracks but continues to shine. I feel like my soul/spirit is my hope and as long as I keep my hope alive my soul will shine. What do I hope for? I do not only hope for myself, I have hope for things for my friends and family and co workers and random strangers… I am always thinking about the people in my life and wishing them well, even if they do not know it.
There is only one hope that I have for myself because there is only one thing I can hope for that I cannot make happen, there is only one thing I cannot work towards and attain because of my efforts. I can get anything else in life I want through working for it but Love is something that only comes to those when it is meant to be. My only hope is that I get to spend the second half of my life with someone who will love me as much as I love them and that I find them soon because I am truly ready to love again and to share all of myself and my life with the right person, for the rest of my time here on earth.
To meet people who have something to say! To share time with people who have lived life and want to share their stories. To live my life to the fullest, making as many memories as possible, so I too have stories to tell. To travel to new places having as many adventures as time will allow and meeting & helping as many beautiful souls as I can along the way.
I desire getting lost in long conversations and warm embraces and passionate kisses with someone who desires and loves me as much as I desire & love them. I want to go on adventures and enjoy every minute that we have on the too short weekends…I want to watch sunsets & sunrises, cloud watching and star gazing…I desire to live my life everyday smiling at least once, sharing a smile with someone and going to bed happy because I got to live another day.
I find joy in creating! Writing, painting, playing my guitar & crafting! It is a huge source of joy for me to indulge in one of my hobbies.
I love to travel and go on adventures too! I try to go someplace new every year, I have lived in Ireland and travelled to 7 countries and several states so far!
I find joy in a warm day in winter, the first buds of spring and the first fallen leaf in Autumn. I find joy in getting a random text message from anyone just to say hi and that they are thinking of me. I find joy in a sky full of clouds and a sunset full of wondrous beauty. I find joy in seeing couples walking hand in hand and the laughter of a child. I find joy in putting my kayak on the water and just enjoying the beauty of life around me. I find joy in people that never give up, people who follow their dreams to the finish line and live the life that makes them happy. I find joy in strangers who always have something nice to say or a smile to share…I find joy in so much of everyday life and it gives me joy to try and share any little part of it that I can.
I work hard for the life I have and I find joy in knowing that anything I want in life can be mine if I want it enough to work for it.I find joy in knowing that everything happens for a reason and in that joy I find hope that everything will always turn out for the best. I find joy every day that I open my eyes and know I am here to do it all over again because I am grateful for this gift called life regardless of what happens.
My Beliefs: I believe part of who I am has to do with my core beliefs. To be a good person, which to me means: always be kind, loving, compassionate and understanding, staying positive and never judge others.
I do not get caught up in religion or politics and try to stay away from negativity…life is too short to focus on the bad. Bad stuff exists that is a fact, but it doesn’t mean we have to dwell on it, we have a choice and I choose to focus on the happy stuff. Life is a better place to live when you do it this way…at least it is for me.
My ambitions: To give back to my community and help others in any way that I can. I feel very fortunate in life and have so many people that have come along throughout my life and helped in many different ways on many different levels and I want to be that person for someone else so it makes sense to follow my dreams and finish school so I can be that person as a Nurse. I am in school now working towards that goal and it is my number one priority, I am aiming for that finish line!
I currently work at the hospital in patient care as I go to Nursing school and it is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life and also to most rewarding. I cannot count the times I have left out of there wearing a smile because I was able to truly help and make a difference in someones life, and that is the reason I am in this field! I want to devote the rest of my life to helping others because making a difference in their life makes a difference in mine ❤
The Negative Stuff:
It would be easy to leave this out, after all no one wants the world to know their insecurities and flaws but I am 40 and single and just do not have the time to be anyone else than who I am so here it goes:
I have a little anxiety, doesn’t everyone? I tend to run when I should walk by rushing into things and being a little too spontaneous at times and I think the biggest fear I have is that I will never know what it feels like to kiss and touch and love another person again.
Physically I have scars, inside and out… I lost a lot of weight a few years ago and with that comes softer untoned skin, hey I’m 40 anyways it isn’t as if I’m ever going to be a bikini model so watevs lol…
I had a breast cancer scare a few years back so I had a very small portion of my left breast removed… it isn’t that noticeable but its there. ..or isn’t I guess lol
I don’t wear a bathing suit without shorts or a swim skirt because of my insecurities about my thighs but if I am with the right person and feel safe and loved then I have nothing to fear…finding that person again though seems to be the challenge.
Spiders and insects that fly with stingers scare the shit out of me lol
My only addiction is to amazon prime lol Hey, I saved $500 last year by avoiding shopping at stores so it was worth it lmao!
I think that is it… not too bad really… I am pretty happy and confident and this list is small compared to a lot of people I know so I think I am doing pretty good at this life stuff ❤
My Dreams: I don’t just wish for what I want, I work hard for it and make my own dreams come true.
This is me.